Now What?

A lot of us have Trauma and are unaware of it. Trauma is different to different people- meaning what may be traumatic to you I will view it or experience it as not traumatic- therefore, it’s subjective.

I had carried so much anger, resentment, and hate towards my ex for abandoning me at the shelter pregnant. I felt betrayed, but I also feel everything happens for a reason.

Adverse Childhood Experiences can affect people as an adult, but Trauma can happen to you as an adult and cause PTSD and affect how you live your life. Below is a simple diagram of ACES (Adverse Childhood Experiences) that can affect you as an adult:

Adverse childhood experiences, or ACEs, are potentially traumatic events that occur in childhood (0-17 years).

Included are aspects of the child’s environment that can undermine their sense of safety, stability, and bonding, Many other traumatic experiences could impact health and wellbeing.

ACEs are linked to chronic health problems, mental illness, and substance use problems in adolescence and adulthood. ACEs can also negatively impact education, job opportunities, and earning potential.

“Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”

– The Buddha

Acknowledging and confronting our trauma can be difficult. It took me years of anxiety, depression, and 1 stress induced seizure for me to wake up and live true to myself. While I would not recommend going against a medical professions recommendations, I did just that. I refused medication telling my doctor “If I didn’t need medication 10 years ago, I shouldn’t need it now”- which made me look at myself and realize I’m the one who is causing my own suffering and I made a lifestyle change that was causing my stress.

So I compared my life to what I was doing then (when I was happier) to what I am doing now (having panic attacks and anxiety).

THEN:  I had a passion for dance, exercise, was active, had hobbies.

WHAT NOW: I joined an adult dance company, a gym, and started practicing Buddhism to get my mind right.

You need to find what makes YOU happy in life and not live under other’s expectations or live under pressure. And by all means if you need to take medication then please do so. Me refusing was MY option We all heal differently and are on our own path to recovery and discovery.